


the meaning of you

by tonicgins



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: Animal Sanctuary AU, F/F, Mutual Pining, Rivalmance, side yvesoul
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:15:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25397524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tonicgins/pseuds/tonicgins
Summary: Heejin looks up, “Wait, what? No! All the animals love you! I don’t think there’s a species on Earth that could resist you…”“Not even you?”(Or, the one where Hyunjin is just so stupidly perfect and Heejin doesn't know how. Also, Sooyoung's a great boss but a hell of a terrible friend for rostering them together.)
Relationships: Jeon Heejin/Kim Hyunjin
Comments: 8
Kudos: 126





	the meaning of you

**Author's Note:**

> This title was randomly inspired by the citypop hit "meaning of you" and the story was inspired by a completely random generated writing prompt, so enjoy!

_‘Hey you, do you know my heart?_

_These days, I’m like a child every day_

_Hiding as I look at you’_

Heejin wakes up to the vague warmness of sunlight on her cheek and the sound of her same-old morning alarm flowing from the phone on her bedside dresser. But today’s anything but _same old_ for her. 

Nineteen years of falling asleep to the same dream of playing with animals for a living. There was truly nothing more Heejin had ever wanted than to work at an animal sanctuary. After months of searching for open internships at animal sanctuaries, attending countless interviews and brushing up tirelessly on her animal care experience, Heejin had finally scored a job at an animal sanctuary that was only an hour’s drive from her home. It was _perfect_. 

Ever since she was five, Heejin had fallen in love with the idea of working at an animal sanctuary. 

It all began with a trip to the local farm sanctuary with her kindergarten class. Admittedly, things had gotten off to a rocky start. Maybe it was the fact that Heejin found it adorable that the baby goat she was feeding had decided her brand-new cardigan was more appetising or the fact that she was more than happy to be stranded by the sheep enclosure. Whatever it was, something about being around all those animals made Heejin feel completely at peace. 

That day, it took her teacher fifteen minutes of convincing and two grape lollipops to drag Heejin away from the sheep. Even though the class had missed her for a whole thirty minutes, she had hardly moved from her spot outside the sheep enclosure. Her tiny hand was stuck through the wooden fence of the pen, waving at the sheep excitedly as she attempted to give them each a pat on the head. Needless to say, she had practically formed an emotional attachment to them at this point. As she was scooped up into the arms of her teacher with the two grape lollipops in hand, little Heejin could barely look away from the sheep who were wistfully staring back at her.

Throwing on the khaki coloured button-up shirt and bermudas set that would be her new uniform, Heejin felt more energised than ever. After a quick breakfast of toast and her usual americano, she was out the door and in the driver’s seat of her Jeep. 

As the jeep trundled down the path to the animal sanctuary, Heejin couldn’t help but notice the change in scenery. The dull, melancholic urban scenery she had grown used to over the past almost two decades faded into the distance and gave way to the countryside which was breathtakingly beautiful and scenic in ways that Heejin had hardly realised throughout her city life. 

In the distance, she could spy the wrought iron gates of the animal sanctuary. They were tall and imposing but were framed by two cute wooden statues of a little brown bear and a red panda which helped to lighten her impression of the place. 

Heejin stuck her head out of the window and peered into the security guard post. 

“Hey! Um, I’m a new intern here. Jeon Heejin for Ms Ha Sooyoung?” She called hopefully into the intercom next to the guardpost. 

A staticky voice crackled back at her from within the intercom. “Jeon Heejin, right! Just drive straight through the gates until you reach the staff carpark. You can park your car there and make your way to the main office afterwards, alright?”

“Thank you!” Heejin responded as she put her jeep back into drive and waited for the gantry to allow her to pass through. 

The main office was surprisingly homely as Heejin let herself through the front door. Warm, tungsten bulbs were strung across the ceiling and the walls were adorned with framed pictures of the staff with a myriad of adorable animals. On the reception, a row of cheery plush animals smiled directly at Heejin. 

“Oh, hey! You’re here! So glad to meet you, Heejin!” A slim, tall woman in a beige suit exclaimed enthusiastically as she extended a hand out to Heejin. 

“I’m Sooyoung, the owner of this little sanctuary! Gosh, you came at a really good time for us actually. We’ve just been heaped with chores- I mean, _fun duties_ \- this past week. Even with all hands on deck, we’ve barely been able to keep up with all the little guys here!” Sooyoung explained as she gestured for Heejin to follow her into the office. 

Heejin laughed politely as she quickly thanked Sooyoung for the internship. “Oh, no problem! I’m just grateful you guys were looking for an intern over here. It took me a while to find a sanctuary that was accepting new people, actually.”

Sooyoung rifled through a little tray as she picked out a tiny metal name tag and handed it to Heejin. “Here you go! Got this done for you over the weekend! It’s spelt correctly, right?” Sooyoung asked as she raised an eyebrow at Heejin.

“Yup, it’s perfect!” Heejin beamed as she quickly pinned the name tag onto the little loop on the left side of her button-up shirt. 

Sooyoung nodded firmly and shot her a thumbs-up, “Great! Come, let me introduce you to everyone!”

The pair winded through the office and into a cosy meeting room where a bunch of other girls were sitting around a desk. On the wall, there was a cluttered roster which was chock full of names and duties along with lists filled with animal medications, shipment information and other receipts. 

“Morning guys! I brought the cavalry!” Sooyoung yelled as she jerked a thumb in Heejin’s direction. The younger girl shot upright as she awkwardly bowed at the other girls in the room. 

“Hi, I’m Heejin. I’m new here but I’ll learn fast to help everyone out!” Heejin said earnestly as she made small waves back at the girls who were smiling at her. 

Sooyoung cleared her throat as she began pointing at the various girls in front of them.

“This is Vivi, she’s in charge of the small mammals. So if you encounter any problems with a critter that has fur and a strange vendetta against you, she’s your girl. That’s Jungeun, she’s currently in charge of managing the birds’ enclosure and organising all the parakeets’ talent shows. Let’s see, who else… Oh! We have one more member on our team actually, Dr Jung… But she’s out on vacation right now…” Sooyoung concluded with a hint of sadness in her voice. The two girls seated around the desk shot each other a knowing look as they eyed Sooyoung’s wistful expression. 

“Wait Sooyoung, wasn’t there supposed to be another newbie joining this week?” Jungeun frowned as she pointed at Heejin. 

Sooyoung’s eyes lit up suddenly as she pulled her phone out to check on the other newbie. 

“Right there _is_ supposed to be another girl, a Kim Hyunjin? Let me give her a call to check on her, yeah?” Sooyoung excused herself from the room as she hastily dialled the other girl.

Heejin’s eyes widened in realisation as it fully hit her.

_Kim Hyunjin_?

Hyunjin had been Heejin’s competitor for the past two years of college, albeit unknowingly. It infuriated Heejin that the other girl was able to so easily charm not just their fellow classmates, but also their professors into giving her the best grades in class. Not only that, but Hyunjin seemed to be able to diagnose a ton of animal ailments with as much as ease as one could muster when it came to looking at a wailing puppy with diabetes. 

“No way…” Heejin muttered under her breath as she shot a furtive glance at Sooyoung through the meeting room windows. 

Vivi looked at Heejin in concern, “What’s wrong?”

Startled out of her own thoughts, Heejin quickly spun around and shook her head. “Nothing! It’s just that she’s an ex-classmate, I think.”

Jungeun shrugged. “Well, isn’t that good? At least there’s somebody you know here with you,” she offered hopefully. 

Just then, Sooyoung burst back into the meeting room. “Ah! It’s not good. Apparently, Hyunjin’s car broke down somewhere beyond the gates. Luckily, she managed to call for some help. She said she’s on the way now, though.”

Sooyoung sighed and crossed her arms as she eyed the roster on the wall of the meeting room. There were a million and one things on their list to complete and they simply couldn’t wait around all day to start. 

“Vivi, why don’t you show Heejin around first? And in the meantime, I’ll find a way to reach Hyunjin. She should be walking here-” Sooyoung was cut off by the sound of the welcome bell by the front door ringing.

A tall, slender blonde in a sleek white coat and dark navy scrubs entered the office with a milder, younger girl following behind her closely. The blonde tossed her hair back and pulled her sunglasses up to rest on her head as she raised an eyebrow at Sooyoung.

“No worries, Sooyoung. I have your girl right here, picked her up somewhere along the main road. Hyunjin, right?” She pointed a finger quizzically at the younger girl who nodded in response. 

Sooyoung’s lip trembled slightly as her eyebrows rose in surprise. “Jin- Dr Jung, didn’t you take a two-week vacation?”

“Please, three years working together- No, seven sweet, amazing years as _friends_ and you still refuse to drop the formalities at work, _my dear Sooyoung_. Or would you prefer, _Soobongie_? Anyways, if you must know, my vacation got cut short because my girlfriend- former girlfriend- decided to break up with me,” Jinsol let out a heavy sigh as she pinched her temples.

Vivi swallowed a giggle as she elbowed Jungeun, “ _Girlfriend?_ More like her _ex-Sooyoung placeholder_ …”

The brunette sucked in a breath as she hesitantly reached a hand out to pat Jinsol on the shoulder. “Fu- Crap, I’m sorry I asked. I didn’t mean to upset you, I was just-”

“Nah, it’s fine. Anyways, lucky for me - I arrived in time to meet you two newbies. Hyunjin and I had quite the conversation on the way here. Who knew a kid could know so much about the prospects of genetic engineering in the field of animal repopulation?” Jinsol exclaimed lightheartedly as she reached out to offer Hyunjin a high-five.

“As you were saying about going about our _day_?” Jungeun interjected pointedly at Sooyoung with a hint of disinterest.

Turning to address the whole team, Sooyoung waved vaguely at the work roster. “Yes, our jobs. Which we are here to complete. Vivi, why don’t you take Hyunjin along too? Jungeun, let’s think about re-organising the parakeets’ performances, they’re getting a little repetitive. Dr J- Jinsol, we received a few medical supply shipments while you were gone but we didn’t really know where to start so… You can go do a stock take, I guess. _Vámonos_ , everyone!”

Jungeun shrugged nonchalantly at Vivi as she turned to follow Sooyoung over to the birds’ enclosures.

Vivi clasped her hands together as she addressed the two new girls. “Today I’ll just be showing both of you the ropes. Nothing too intense, don’t worry!” 

The older woman giggled as she tugged on a pair of gaudy yellow knee-high boots, “By the way, you guys might need a pair of these. Let me go get them for you, hold on!” With that, Vivi took off towards a storeroom somewhere further within the office. 

Heejin stood in silence with her arms crossed tightly, silently eyeing Hyunjin. The taller girl was decked out in the same beige uniform as her, except she didn’t quite look as exhausted as Heejin. A few minutes passed in silence as Heejin continued to stare surreptitiously at her ex-classmate, now coworker. 

“You’re Jeon Heejin, right? We were classmates? I’m not sure if you remember me, but-”

“I do. You’re Kim Hyunjin.”

Hyunjin looked taken aback as she nodded, “Yeah, that’s me. Hey! At least we have each other here, I didn’t realise they were taking on more than one intern. How cool is that?”

Heejin huffed as she attempted to avoid any eye contact with Hyunjin, “Hmph, I guess.”

Right then, Vivi appeared in her periphery with two pairs of the exact same knee-high yellow boots she was wearing, in her arms. She lifted them up and waved them in the direction of the two girls as she gestured towards the door. 

“Let’s go, girls! Those red panda babies won’t feed themselves!”

\--

As the three girls walked, Heejin realised that the sanctuary was much larger than it looked from the outside and from the few pictures that Heejin had managed to find online. In fact, it had been strangely difficult for her to find pictures of the insides of the sanctuary online. 

When Heejin told her best friend, Chaewon, about her internship, the other girl’s first reaction was _‘Girl, are you sure it’s not just some elaborate scam? I mean, it sounds pretty shady. Maybe it’s a murder sanctuary!’_ And to be fair, it did seem dubious that the sanctuary was so secretive.

Finally able to fully appreciate her surroundings, Heejin admired the way the trees framed the sunlight perfectly. Small, translucent beams of sunlight danced along the forest floor as they trod on the crunchy fallen leaves. 

“Hey Vivi, I was wondering- Why don’t you guys have a bigger online presence?” Heejin asked as she continued to take in her surroundings. 

Vivi hummed in acknowledgement. “Well, on the one hand, it’s due to the fact that we didn’t really want too much external scrutiny. Y’know, since Sooyoung bought the place over from this guy who was practically exploiting the animals? We weren’t receiving a ton of good press at the beginning. A lot of people doubted that a young, inexperienced woman like Sooyoung could even manage a place as big as _this_ ,” Vivi paused to gesture at the surroundings, “And on the other hand, it’s also because Sooyoung sucks at web design and maintaining any social media presence at all. She had to ask me how to change the font on a word document last week. And the week before, she literally asked Jinsol how to delete a post from her _Facebook_ account!” 

The group shared a collective laugh as they continued moving deeper into the sanctuary. “But yeah, we’re working on it! Hey! You guys are young, maybe you can help us out!” Vivi added cheerily with her eyes gleaming. 

Finally, after a good twenty-minute walk, they had reached the red pandas’ enclosure. 

As soon as Vivi managed to climb into the enclosure, a little group of red pandas scampered up to her and started tapping on her calves with their paws. “Look at these little guys! Aww, they’re adorable!” Heejin gushed as she stood wide-eyed at the corner of the fence. 

“Wait, so what kind of diet do you keep them on? Since red pandas are vegetarian carnivores and all…” Hyunjin asked as she looked curiously at the red pandas behind the fence. 

Heejin paused. “Vegetarian what?” She muttered under her voice in complete confusion. 

“We feed them a variety of meals! Mostly bamboo or very small insects but today is their cheat day so they’re getting apples. Wanna feed them?” Vivi tossed a small baggy of sliced apples at Heejin and Hyunjin as she waved them over. The two girls quickly clambered over the short gate and approached the pandas slowly. 

Heejin reached into the bag and pulled out a few small apple slices as she lowered herself into a semi-squat to be at eye level with the pandas. “Pspspsps, pandas…” She awkwardly whispered as she waved an apple slice in the vague direction of the pandas. 

“Woah, hold on guys! There is more than enough for all of you!” Hyunjin squealed as the group of pandas quickly migrated over from Vivi and began jumping up against her leg excitedly. She bent down to place an apple slice in the mouths of each red panda before jumping up to get more apples from Vivi. 

Heejin watched as the red pandas followed Hyunjin around, her heart felt just a little heavy. She tightened her grip on the plastic baggy of apples as she bit her lip in disappointment. 

Spying her disappointment from afar, Hyunjin quickly made her way towards Heejin - the pandas in her wake. “Hey, I think they’re still hungry for more. I’m overwhelmed, help me out?” Hyunjin offered earnestly as she pointed sheepishly at her massive following of little red pandas.

“Y- Yeah, sure,” Heejin tried her best to hide her sadness as she half-heartedly gave the pandas tiny pats on their heads as they nibbled on their apple slices. 

“Hey, don’t be too sad. I’m sure they like you, secretly,” Hyunjin wrinkled her nose at Heejin as she lowered her voice into a whisper. 

Heejin remained silent as she simply turned towards the other direction and made her way back towards the gate where Vivi was waiting for them. “Hey girls, we still have two little stops to make. First, to change some horseshoes and next, to go help Jungeun make sure that all the birds haven’t escaped somehow.” 

Upon hearing the word ‘birds’, a shiver ran down Heejin’s spine. She hated the stupid things, with their up-to-no-good beady bird eyes, their weird, sharp beaks, their annoying calling noises, their stupid, round bird bodies. There was simply not a single redeeming thing about the entire species of birds and Heejin was convinced that birds were simply misclassified pests. The truth was, they creeped her out. Maybe it was the way they would watch her with their glassy, judgemental eyes but Heejin hated being around them. 

“Can I skip out on the birds? I’m kind of… I have a bird phobia.” Heejin could barely admit as she tried to avert any eye contact with Vivi. 

Hyunjin looked at Heejin, “Hey, maybe I can help you take some notes? Just some general pointers should you ever need to deal with them?”

Heejin’s eyes widened and then, she nodded silently. 

“Okay, if that’s settled- Hyunjin, you can follow me and Heejin, go look for Sooyoung somewhere. She’ll find something for you to do!”

The trip back to the main office felt oddly lonely. Heejin’s boots crushed the leaves beneath them as she avoided a bunch of spider webs that threatened to descend on her. Just then, she heard a soft mewling sound coming from a thick, unkempt patch of grass. Drawing closer, she discovered two baby kittens huddled closely together. Judging from their skinny bodies and the way they were shivering, Heejin could only surmise that they had been abandoned. 

She looked around the area for any sign of their mom for a good few minutes before she made her way back to the kittens. “Too bad, babies. I can’t seem to find your mom. Gah, what the hell? I’ll just take you with me,” Heejin groaned as she unbuttoned the beige uniform button-up she was wearing. Luckily, she had wisely worn a singlet underneath. 

Bending down fully, Heejin carefully scooped the kittens into her shirt one by one before swaddling them gently and carrying them in her arms. They could barely open their eyes and she could see their rib cages clearly under their thin fur. 

“Jeez, I hope Sooyoung won’t be mad about this. Actually, what? This is an animal sanctuary, what are you saying?” Heejin muttered to herself as she looked warmly at the two babies in her arms. 

As she approached the front door of the office, Heejin slowly used her boot to open the door. Trying to cradle the kittens as she manoeuvred into the office, she was greeted by Jinsol. The doctor eyed her curiously as she watched Heejin carry the two kittens in her arms. 

“Hey kid, we have a dress code in here!” Jinsol called out jokingly as she pointed at Heejin’s torso. Heejin frowned as she leaned the kittens over at Jinsol, “Um… What do I do with them?”

Jinsol walked nearer to Heejin, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion as she peeked at the two kittens who had fallen asleep in Heejin’s shirt. She gently lifted their paws as she examined their bodies with care. “They look malnutritioned, probably because their mother left them alone for too long. Where did you find them?” Jinsol asked as she jerked her head in the direction of her medical examination room. 

“Somewhere between clearings 23 and 24? I tried to look for their mom but she wasn’t anywhere nearby. I’m afraid she might be injured somewhere else, though,” Heejin’s mouth arched into a disheartened frown. She gently laid her shirt out on Jinsol’s medical examination table as she ensured the kittens were comfortable. 

“Alright, let me take a closer look at them. They’re too small for an IV so we might have to bottle feed them slowly,” Jinsol observed as she tilted her flashlight to check for any physical wounds on the kittens’ bodies.

At that moment, Sooyoung breezed into the room with two cups of coffee in hand. “Jung Jinsol, we need to tal- Oh, Heejin! What brings you here? Vivi just radioed in at the birds’ enclosure, weren’t you with her?”

Heejin tapped the toe of her boot against the floor awkwardly. “Sorry, I kind of- I’m scared of birds…” 

Jinsol burst into a short burst of laughter as she held her stomach. Heejin looked at the ground as she attempted to hide her embarrassment. “Oh my god, wait. You were being serious. That sucks!” Jinsol added quickly as she noticed Heejin’s expression.

Sooyoung shot Jinsol a look as she quickly rushed over to sling an arm around Heejin’s shoulders. “It’s fine! We all have our weakness…” She trailed off as she sighed in Jinsol’s vague direction. Heejin shifted in her boots as she felt the tension between the other two women wane. 

“Anyways, you can leave the kittens to Jinsol. Come back in a while, maybe you can feed them then! In the meantime, what do you say you and I go for a quick drive around the sanctuary? I need to make sure this one mischievous chimp hasn’t jumped the fence again…” Sooyoung smiled invitingly at Heejin. 

Heejin nodded excitedly, “Really? That would be great! But first, you guys don’t happen to have a spare uniform top, right?” She looked at the two women hopefully.  
  


Rising from her chair, Jinsol rifled through a bunch of shirts hanging on a coat hanger in the corner of the room. “Here, you can borrow mine. It’s clean, I swear. It’s just the smell of antiseptic from the room if you don’t mind,” Jinsol fanned the shirt in an attempt to air out the faint smell of antiseptic that clung to it. 

“It’s okay, I don’t mind. Thanks! I’ll return it to you- washed, of course- by tomorrow!” Heejin said earnestly as she slipped the shirt over her shoulders. 

The keys to the rover jingled in Sooyoung’s hands as Heejin followed behind her.

Sooyoung cleared her throat. “So, I was really glad to receive your application for the internship, actually. I liked your write-up about why you wanted to work here very much, it reminded me of how I came to be in this business actually,” she addressed Heejin.

Heejin blushed as she looked at Sooyoung in admiration, “Thanks for taking me on, really. I mean, it was tough for me to find work because I didn’t really top the class…”

“Ah, yes. That was Hyunjin, right? I was surprised to see that she applied here too.”

Sooyoung paused in her step to turn to Heejin. “Heejin, sometimes it doesn’t matter how you do on some dumb test. You just have to leave it to other people to have the perfect grades, perfect socials, whatever it is. What you’ve got instead is a ton of genuine passion and that’s something I don’t see that very often! Chin up, yeah?” she reassured the younger girl.

As Heejin stared at her in awe, Sooyoung could only quicken her pace in embarrassment at the cheesy motivational speech she made. 

\--

Weeks passed and Hyunjin was still being _stupidly_ perfect. 

She made friends with the animals, joked around with Jungeun during breaks and carried out her chores with Vivi so effortlessly and with such a lighthearted air about her that it made Heejin feel endlessly envious of her. 

Even while doing the most mundane chores, she seemed to enjoy herself. Heejin had lost count of the number of times she would be straining to carry buckets of feed to the enclosures, her arms shaking from exhaustion when Hyunjin would magically appear next to her, sweep the buckets off her as if they weighed nothing and quickly walk off with a kind smile - leaving Heejin speechless in her wake. She could swear she had even seen Hyunjin putting on her usual smile as she swept up deer droppings.

On top of that, Hyunjin was an extremely fast learner. In their first week at the sanctuary, Jungeun had already praised Hyunjin’s bird training skills and after a mere month of working with the parakeets, Hyunjin was thrust on stage during the parakeets’ performances to show off the little tricks she had taught the birds. Jinsol had even complimented Hyunjin for her amazing memory after the girl managed to memorise the medication charts of every single monkey under their care. 

If it was any comfort to Heejin, it seemed that there was some sort of emotional distance between Hyunjin and Sooyoung. Sooyoung offered not more than a tight-lipped polite smile and nod to Hyunjin each morning and in return, Hyunjin could only afford a hasty, awkward bow. Yet, Sooyoung was always quick to offer Heejin cups of coffee in the morning and give her quick hugs before she left in the evening. 

The kittens that Heejin had rescued grew pretty quickly too. The babies which had once been able to fit in the palm of Heejin’s hands were now rowdy little rascals. She made sure to spend every single one of her breaks nursing and playing with them in Jinsol’s office. 

The doctor had insisted that the kittens remain under her care until they were at least a few months old. “Hey, baby kittens are very fragile! One little fall and they could be seriously injured. Plus… they’re good company!” Jinsol insisted when Sooyoung had complained that the kittens’ mewling was distracting her in the office. 

“Hi guys, I’m back! Did you miss me?” Heejin cooed as she sat cross-legged on the floor in front of the kittens’ pen. Carefully reaching into the pen, she coaxed the kittens into her arms one by one before gently lowering them to the ground. Heejin beamed proudly as she lifted one of the kittens up. 

Both kittens were decked in matching tiny dinosaur hats, one in green and the other in pink. On one of her weekend breaks, Heejin had spotted a bunch of tiny animal accessories at the pet shop in her neighbourhood mall. Instantly, she _knew_ she had to buy them for the kittens - they would be simply too adorable in them. 

“Hey Heejin, am I interrupting something?” Heejin turned to see Hyunjin leaning against the door to Jinsol’s office. Heejin shook her head as she raised her eyebrows, “What do you need?”

Hyunjin took a few steps forward and sat on the ground next to Heejin. “You know how Jinsol is organising that little birthday thing at the bar for Sooyoung next week? I was thinking you could help me pick out a gift for her. Um, considering the two of you are kind of close?” Hyunjin asked hopefully as she watched Heejin adjust the little hats on the kittens’ heads.

“Yeah, we’re close. You were invited? I didn’t think you and Sooyoung were close,” Heejin frowned slightly as she turned to Hyunjin. 

“I don’t know, but I just have the feeling Sooyoung doesn’t really like me. Or maybe, we’re just awkward. I felt bad about it and Jinsol decided that maybe going to this party might help us to get closer,” Hyunjin sighed as she tucked her knees against her chest. 

Heejin hummed, “Yeah, that’s a very Jinsol-like thing to do.”

“Yeah, she’s really nice. So, about the gift… could you help me out? I feel like you have great taste in gifts.” Hyunjin pursed her lips as she looked at Heejin for an answer.

“I’m kind of busy this week, actually. Why don’t you ask Vivi or Jungeun instead?”

“Yeah, I could- But I really wanted your input because you and Sooyoung look really close… Uh, and not in the way Jinsol is,” Hyunjin grimaced as she eyed Jinsol’s office.

Heejin nodded in agreement, “Yeah, I suppose so. Look, I’m not really sure why _you_ even care but Sooyoung’s not really much of a gift person. She’s not exactly _materialistic_ like that.”

Hyunjin’s eyebrows furrowed as she paused to fully comprehend Heejin’s words. “What? Of course, I care, Sooyoung’s my boss- A really nice one, too.”

“What I mean is, you don’t really seem to get along well with her an-”

“Heejin, I don’t- Look, ever since I’ve got here you’ve just been giving me the cold shoulder. I’ve tried so hard- You won’t believe how often I’ve tried to convince- This is so frustrating! Stop making this personal, _please_. This isn’t about you and me, this is about finding a gift for Sooyoung. You need to stop being such a damn _child_ and tell me what it is about me that makes you hate me so much,” Hyunjin exasperatedly lashed out as she angrily threaded a hand through her hair. 

Heejin bit her bottom lip in guilt as both of them fell into an uncomfortable silence. 

Quickly composing herself, Hyunjin stood up and dusted herself off. “You know, I’ve tried my best to be nice to you. Hell, I wanted to be _friends_ with you,” Hyunjin’s voice quivered as she betrayed a tone of hurt. 

There was nothing Heejin could say as she watched Hyunjin leave in silence.

\--

Needless to say, the atmosphere at the party was heavy between Hyunjin and Heejin that weekend. 

Jinsol had organised an absolute _rager_ for Sooyoung’s birthday by putting her seemingly endless contact book to good use. Somehow, she had managed to secure a _Michelin Star_ caterer, order crates of high-end liquor, commission an ice sculpture of Sooyoung and some animals, book one of the country’s most sought-after DJs and compose a guest list which was longer than the population census of a small island. 

“What the hell? How did you afford all of this? And who are these people, anyway!” Sooyoung yelled at Jinsol over the thumping music as she squeezed past a bunch of guests who were hypnotically gyrating in a circle. “Relax, some friends owed a couple of favours and well… these are the friends of those friends of _more_ friends!” Jinsol waved her off casually as she passed Sooyoung another glass of some expensive liquor or the other. 

Spying Heejin moping across the dance floor as she nursed another glass of coke and rum, Sooyoung quickly squeezed her way over. “Be right back! Heejin problems!” Sooyoung hissed to Jinsol as she pointed at the younger girl who was now leaning her head against the bar as she tapped a finger against her glass.

Heejin’s eyes traced droplets of condensation on the surface of her glass as her fingers absentmindedly tapped against the bar. _So much for giving Hyunjin the cold shoulder_ , she thought as she squinted to see Hyunjin and Vivi dancing together at the other side of the club. Just as she blearily contemplated another glass of something stronger, a fuzzy figure appeared in her line of sight.

“Who’s this? Who’s you?” Heejin slurred as she tried to make out the form in front of her. Sooyoung sighed in dismay at the younger girl’s sad state. Judging from the half-finished glass of coke and rum along with the tiny empty shot glasses, Heejin would be positively hungover the next morning. She slid into the bar chair next to Heejin and tried to sit the other girl up properly, steadying her as she almost lurched off the chair and onto the ground. 

“Hey, you. Enough alcohol for tonight! I’m telling Jinsol to take away your free-flow alcohol privileges,” Sooyoung tutted as she watched Heejin hiccup and then stifle a gag. 

“Sooyoung! Sooyoung, I hate myself so much. Am I a bad person?” Heejin wailed dramatically as her arms stretched out to pull Sooyoung into a desperate embrace. Sooyoung’s nose wrinkled as the smell of alcohol wafted off Heejin and straight into her. She really needed to get Heejin home and then, into a shower.

“No. Not really sure what happened to you, but I can assure you it’s fine. Now, let’s get you home.” Sooyoung answered resolutely as she tried to hoist Heejin off the bar chair by the arm.

Heejin yanked Sooyoung back down into her bar chair, fingers digging into her shoulder blades as she stared Sooyoung straight in the eyes. “Am I a bad person for not wanting Hyunjin to be so perfect? Why is she so perfect? Why does she always have to be better than me? Why does it matter so much? It shouldn’t matter!” Heejin blubbered, tears welling up in her eyes as she groaned into Sooyoung’s shoulder.

_Oh, so this is what it’s all about,_ Sooyoung exhaled heavily in realisation as she watched Heejin bury her head further into the crevice in her shoulder. 

It had been an awfully awkward week of being in the office for Sooyoung, too. In her spare time, Sooyoung often spied on her staff through the window of her personal office. Usually, she’d just catch Jungeun eating a snack she dropped on the floor or Vivi laughing to herself for no clear reason. But over the past week, she’d noticed a change in the atmosphere- specifically whenever Heejin and Hyunjin would enter the pantry at the same time or brush past each other between cubicles. 

On occasion, Hyunjin and Heejin had even exchanged pleasantries in the past but these had quickly dissolved. Sooyoung watched in confusion as any sign of even the slightest acknowledgement of the other party dissipated between the two younger girls. Hyunjin had barely even glanced the other way when Heejin was bringing the kittens around the office in her upturned bucket hat (and Sooyoung knew there was no way Hyunjin would _ever_ willingly ignore baby kittens). 

“You’re not a bad person, Heejin. You’ve just made a mistake.” Sooyoung pulled Heejin off her to grip her shoulder firmly. “Now once you sober up, you can think about how you’re going to make amends.”

The younger girl shot up from her seat, eyes widened in a drink-induced state of determined stupor. “No… I’ll do it now, I’ll just say ‘I’m Sorry’ and forget about everything and maybe she’ll forgive me,” Heejin mumbled as she charged towards Hyunjin at a speed which was unprecedented for someone with that much alcohol charging through her veins. 

For a pint-sized girl with at least six shots of tequila running through her, Heejin was surprisingly stable. Her head pounded - whether it was from the adrenaline or the onset of her hangover, she couldn’t be sure. Reaching Hyunjin, she poked the other girl sharply in her back.

“Heejin? No, I can’t do this with you right now. You’re drunk,” Hyunjin asserted as she turned to Vivi for help to drag Heejin to the side.

Heejin pointed a finger squarely at Hyunjin, wincing as she felt her head begin to throb even more furiously. 

“No, I want to talk to you. God, you’re so perfect, even up-close. I hate you, Hyunjin,” Heejin groaned as she pinched the space between her eyebrows, “But that doesn’t mean I should hate you for being perfect. Stupidly, stupidly perfect. What I’m saying is, I’m sorry. I don’t hate you. Not really-” Heejin’s blabbering was truncated abruptly by Sooyoung jerking her away from Hyunjin forcefully as she hauled Heejin through the crowd. 

“Sooyoung, no. You need to let me go, I’m not done-” Heejin thumped on Sooyoung’s back in vain as the older woman resolutely guided her through the throngs of intoxicated party guests and out onto the sidewalk. 

Sooyoung sat Heejin down against the curb slowly, pulling her phone out to dial for a cab.

“How’d you know my address?” Heejin slurred as her ears pricked up at Sooyoung reciting her address fluently. “I’ve got all the employee files backed up on an online server,” Sooyoung answered simply. 

Blindingly white headlights approached them, causing Heejin to squeeze her eyes shut tightly. As the yellow cab screeched to a halt next to the two girls, Sooyoung threw Heejin’s arm over her shoulders and lifted her into the cab. Looking endearingly at the younger girl who was already on the verge of passing out, she rested a hand on Heejin’s shoulder.

“Hey, drop me or Jinsol a text when you reach home. We’ve to make sure you got back in one piece.” Sooyoung reminded her as she shut the door to the taxi. 

As Sooyoung grew smaller in the distance, Heejin’s bleary mind could only focus on the groaning of the taxi’s engine and the soft, rhythmic lull of her headache as her eyelids grew heavier.

\--

Waking up the next morning was only the second most humiliating event of the day. She found herself sprawled out unceremoniously on the edge of her family sofa, her head throbbing incessantly and her mouth feeling like it had been stuffed full with cotton. Her sister had given her a look of disgust when she stumbled into their shared room, reeking of alcohol and shame as she quickly snatched her towel off the door and slipped into the bathroom. 

However, the worst part of her day was arriving at the front door of the main office later that morning. Whoever thought it was a good idea to host a party at a club in the middle of the week- Jinsol, apparently- should’ve been banned from ever making another sound judgement because it was becoming more apparent to Heejin with every passing minute that it was one of the worst decisions in her entire life. 

She could barely feel her toes as she haphazardly took the steps one at a time and her boots felt way heavier than usual. It was humiliating enough when Vivi had to steady her and offer her an Aspirin when she tripped on a step, but it got even worse when she stepped into the meeting room and had to come face to face with Hyunjin. 

The sight of the other girl’s face was enough to send a wave of panicked brain chemicals flooding through Heejin’s brain as she felt her heart rate rise exponentially in a horrifying mixture of anxiety and shame. The hairs on the back of her neck prickled as she felt the other girl staring daggers at the back of her head throughout the entirety of their usual morning staff meeting. Even as Sooyoung rambled on about the rest of the week’s tasks, Heejin could barely register anything besides the tension which hung over their heads like a stale, heavy weight. 

Suddenly, her name was being called. 

“Heejin. Heejin, did you get that? I’m putting you in charge of the Saturday night check-ins. Don’t worry, it’s not much to do and you won’t be alone. Jungeun, can you help out?” Sooyoung glanced back at the team as she noted Heejin’s name down on the weekly roster. 

Jungeun groaned, “Sooyoung… But I’ve been doing those for ages! Like literally, AGES. Hey, actually- Hyunjin! Why don’t you hang around with Heejin and make sure the birds don’t perish since Heejin’s actually never even once remotely come near them?” Heejin could detect a tone of disappointment hanging onto Jungeun’s words as she watched for Hyunjin’s reaction. 

“Um, hey. I’m totally alright with doing this alone if you don’t want to come back-” Heejin cut in quickly as she mumbled apologetically at Hyunjin. 

The taller girl raised an eyebrow, “It’s fine. I’ll help out. Sooyoung, put me in. I’ll come back on Saturdays to give Heejin a hand.”

Heejin shook her head ‘no’ desperately at Sooyoung, her eyes pleading as she began to feel overwhelmed by dread and guilt. She could barely stand to look at Hyunjin now, much less work with her alone. Moreover, she could barely come to terms with the fact that she had practically gushed at Hyunjin and called her _‘stupidly perfect’_ to her face the night before. 

“Sounds good! It’s settled, then. Heejin and Hyunjin. The both of you are in charge of night check-ins, starting from this Saturday’s night check-in. Thank you for your service!” Sooyoung jokingly saluted both of the younger girls as she added the word ‘Hyunjin’ directly under Heejin’s name on the roster.

_Saturday is definitely no longer my favourite day of the week anymore now_ , Heejin thought as she shivered at the idea in dismay. 

\-- 

The months pass by them quickly. The initial tension and much of the awkwardness between the two girls melt away due to a coupling of Hyunjin’s lame attempts at humour and Heejin’s propensity to stare at Hyunjin. Heejin could barely keep track of how often she would be staring at Hyunjin shamelessly, only to slink away quickly whenever the girl would actually make an effort to talk to her. It felt like they had gone back to normal, or at least _close_ to whatever they could even consider normal, to begin with. 

All of a sudden, it’s Saturday night again. The weird funky 80s sounding lobby music is all too loud in the main office and Heejin curses at the way her foot is still tapping to it rhythmically out of nervousness and familiarity. She hears the sound of a door opening, then closing before she looks up to see Hyunjin hanging by the corner of her cubicle with a large cardboard box in her arms. 

“This song really sounds like ‘ _Hot Stuff_ ’, doesn’t it?” Hyunjin muses as she glances around quizzically trying to determine the source of the catchy lobby music. Heejin manages a small, awkward smile as she brushes past Hyunjin. “I’ll go grab the other boxes, sorry. Where are you bringing them?”

Hyunjin pauses as if she’s unable to remember where she was going. 

“Uh, you can just leave them in the warehouse? Jinsol said she’ll do the stock check herself this time.” There’s an edge of uncertainty in Hyunjin’s voice and Heejin is quick to pick up on it. Shrugging it off, Heejin slides the last stick of strawberry mint gum off her desk and pops it into her mouth as she wills herself to last the night without spontaneously combusting or having an emotional breakdown. 

She should have expected it by now, but the cardboard boxes were way heavier than Hyunjin had made them look when she walked past earlier - they always were. Heejin huffs out a tiny groan as she puts her weight on her foot, trying to steady herself as she slips her fingers under the base of the cardboard box. 

“Jesus, Jinsol… Of all the days in the week that you could’ve ordered five-litre bottles of saline?” Heejin complains to herself as she tries to slip her hands further under the box to get a better grip. 

“Heejin?” A voice calls out from behind her. Surprised by the sudden intrusion, Heejin’s grip on the box loosens and the box comes down on her fingers with a dull thud. It’s a pain which does not immediately overwhelm her and she actually manages to convince herself that her fingers might not have even sustained any injury. That is, until Hyunjin comes rushing over to pry the box of her hands and she sees the blood oozing out of a crack in her nail and feels the throbbing in her jammed fingers. 

By some miracle, Hyunjin manages to keep Heejin sane on their way to the medical office. _It’s ridiculous_ , Hyunjin thinks. She watches as Heejin tries unsuccessfully to keep her tears from brimming in her eyes as she glances back and forth between her cracked nail and the finger on her left hand that was somehow semi-permanently caught in a bent position. “Hyunjin, I am going to die!” Heejin cries dramatically as she watches the blood drip off her finger and leaves a trail on the floor.

“Where are all the _human_ medical supplies?” Hyunjin ponders as she rifles through yet another drawer of creams and ointments for animals. 

Heejin lets out another stifled groan as she tries her best to stop staring at the cracked nail. “Maybe it’s because we’re literally in the medical office of an animal sanctuary and not in the first-aid room?” Heejin snaps back between clenched teeth. 

Hyunjin ignores her and continues to search through the drawers. _This is the third bottle of tortoise haemorrhoid cream_ , Hyunjin thinks as she closes yet another drawer. How was it even possible that not a single thing in this whole office was not suitable for human usage? 

Hyunjin closes her eyes to think. “Okay, I think we need to go to the first-aid room. It’s no good here,” she announces as she turns to sympathetically look at Heejin. 

The trip to the first-aid room on the opposite end of the office blocks is even more awkward than the first one. Heejin tries to focus on the way Hyunjin takes her steps rhythmically. 

_Clop, clop, clop, clop._ Hyunjin stops in her path to turn back at Heejin. 

“Stop counting my steps and pick up the pace,” Hyunjin says simply. Heejin shrinks into her boots at the command and hurries behind Hyunjin.

Hyunjin had only been into the first-aid room twice throughout her time at the animal sanctuary. The first time was when she had fed a parakeet the wrong type of food and it pecked her with the ferocity of something besides what was supposedly a _bird of paradise_. The second time was when she had backed into Jinsol in the medical examination room and stomped on her foot (although that was more for the benefit of Jinsol who could have single-handedly written an entire thesaurus of curses with the words that fluently exited her mouth). 

The lights in the first-aid room are stark white, harsh on both their eyes as Hyunjin fumbles with the keyring attached to her waist. The room itself was also rather bare, save for a simple reclined seat and a glass cabinet at the corner of the room. A tiny painting of some scenery hung in solitude in the middle of the room in a futile attempt to freshen up the room. _Vivi was right, Sooyoung really did suck at both web and interior design_ , Heejin thinks to herself.

Suddenly, Heejin was all too cognisant of the empty feeling in her vest pocket. “Hyunjin, I left my phone in the medical office. Crap!” Heejin cursed as she let out a heavy sigh.

“So? You still have your walkie on you right?” Hyunjin shoots a confused glance at Heejin as she manages to pull a first-aid kit and some painkillers out of the glass cabinet. She also manages to find two bottles of water in the corner of the cabinet. 

Heejin grumbles, “Yeah, but it’s _my phone_.” 

“Who else would be looking for you right now besides me?”

“I don’t know! Sooyoung? Vivi?” 

Hyunjin swallows a snide comment as she twists the cap off a bottle of water and hands it to Heejin. “Here, drink this and then take one of these painkillers… Or at least, I think they’re painkillers?” The taller girl drops two pale tablets into Heejin’s quivering palm. 

Quickly downing the water like it was a shot, Heejin shudders as she swallows both tablets down in a single gulp. 

“Do you ever go easy on anything?” Hyunjin chuckles sarcastically.

Heejin hated it whenever Hyunjin would tease her about her poor alcohol tolerance. “Shut the hell up, that was a bad night for me and anyways I would have never humiliated myself apologising to you if I wasn’t-” 

Just as Heejin was about to humiliate herself once again, the two girls were plunged into darkness. The lights above them crackled tauntingly once, twice, then fizzled out completely. 

If there was anything that Heejin hated more than birds, it would’ve been the darkness. She hated the way it felt when the movie theatre lights would dim, she hated walking from her washroom to her bed in the darkness and most of all, she definitely hated having to be around Hyunjin alone in the dark.

Heejin raises her hands up to cradle her head as she pulls her knees up onto the bench and tucks them beneath her. No doubt, it was a childish fear to be afraid of the dark. Perhaps, it was even more silly and childish that she was tucked in a fetal position because of said fear. _At least Hyunjin can’t see me like this_ , Heejin thinks as she squints to make out the shape of Hyunjin in the darkness.

Right at that moment, Hyunjin clicks on a flashlight and shines it directly at Heejin who quickly unfurls herself and resumes sitting uncomfortably on the edge of the bench even though she could feel the hairs at the back of her neck stand. “Are you okay?” Hyunjin asks genuinely as she puts the flashlight between her teeth to pull a roll of bandages and antiseptic ointment out of the first aid kit.

Heejin watches the other girl’s jaw clench attractively as her eyebrows furrow in thought. A wave of strange, possibly indecent thoughts course through her brain. 

“Hands,” Hyunjin commands simply as she gestures for Heejin to lift her hands up from her lap.

Hyunjin reaches over for Heejin’s hand and tugs it onto her own lap. Heejin thinks it can’t possibly get any more uncomfortable for her right now as she feels the coldness at the back of her palm come in contact with the warmth of Hyunjin’s thighs. 

“Are you cold?” Hyunjin says mildly as she looks up to meet Heejin’s eyes. Heejin shakes her head firmly and pouts slightly even though she can feel her teeth chattering lightly already. 

_Heejin’s infuriating_ , Hyunjin thinks as she drops Heejin’s hand back onto the bench and pulls her coat off her shoulders swiftly. The flashlight casts a long shadow of Hyunjin’s back onto the wall and Heejin watches it as if in a trance. Before she can even say anything, Hyunjin has her coat draped across Heejin’s back. 

“Look, you have your walkie on right?” 

“Yeah.”

“Jungeun told me there was a generator near the main office building. Apparently, they had it installed last year because the power to the sanctuary just keeps going out, you know, due to the fact that we’re at least ten kilometres from the nearest power station. I’ll go over there and try to get it up and running and I’ll also try to grab your phone on the way back. Alright?” Hyunjin clips her own walkie talkie to the back of her waistband. 

Heejin is unable to respond. As much as she dreaded spending time with Hyunjin, she dreaded, even more greatly, the thought of being stuck alone in the dark. She could’ve sworn she had already heard weird noises coming from outside the first-aid room (they were probably just the calls of one of Jungeun’s stupid birds). 

Hyunjin pokes Heejin in the shoulder before waving her walkie talkie at her. “Hey, keep it at frequency two, okay? I’ll be back soon,” Hyunjin places the walkie talkie back onto the space next to Heejin and turns around towards the door.

Suddenly, a strange force overwhelms Heejin and she is propelled off the bench and towards Hyunjin. Her feet carry her towards the door before she is even able to form the words that are in her mind. 

“Wait, no! Please don’t… Please don’t let me stay here alone,” Heejin pleads, completely aware of how pathetic this is making her look. 

Hyunjin quirks an eyebrow, “What? Why? What- Are you scared of the dark or something?” 

Silence.

“Oh… Wowwww. So, you’re actually scared of the dark?” Hyunjin’s amusement breaks the silence as she watches Heejin turn away from her in embarrassment. 

Heejin’s voice hitches as she tries her best to come up with an excuse, _any_ excuse. “No, idiot. You can’t go outside with your coat, it’s freezing out there! Just making sure you don’t catch frostbite… Or something,” Heejin mumbled as she tugged the coat off her own shoulders and thrust it back at Hyunjin.

Hyunjin reaches for Heejin’s hand gently instead of the coat and pulls her along towards the door. 

“Come on. You can keep the coat, dummy. It’s September,” Hyunjin says as she holds the door open for Heejin. 

The generator is located so annoyingly far that Heejin regrets following Hyunjin even before they’ve covered a 100 metres. Between the sounds of their heavy footsteps and Hyunjin’s shallow breathing, Heejin is having a hard time trying not to think about what could be lurking out in the dark. As a kid, she never attended sleepovers with friends or night camps in school because she could never fall asleep in complete darkness and apparently it was _weird_ to bring your own nightlight along. 

Reaching forward, Heejin’s fingers find the coarse material of Hyunjin’s button-up and grip firmly. Hyunjin turns back to look at Heejin in concern, “Are you alright?” She sees the way Heejin’s teeth chatter even under the two coats she’s wearing, the quivering in her bandaged hands which don’t seem to be simply affected by the cold. After all, it’s barely autumn.

“Come here,” Hyunjin whispers as she yanks Heejin under her arm by the hood of her coat. The sudden embrace makes Heejin flinch, it feels infinitely more awkward now then it did just now. “Um, you don’t have to do this. I’m not actually that cold anymore,” Heejin mutters as she tries to focus on anything but Hyunjin’s warmth against the side of her body.

Hyunjin simply hums, “I know. But I know you’re scared of the dark, too.”

Silence. 

“This is my way of showing you that you’ve nothing to be afraid of, by the way.”

“What?”

“Because I’m here, silly.”

Heejin can’t find the words to respond and so she settles for silence and warmth. 

They hear the humming of the generator as they approach it. It’s a big, blinking thing with way too many confusing switches and panels for Hyunjin to feel fully confident that she’ll be able to actually get any power back on. She scans the generator slowly, trying to make sense of all the labels above the lights. There are a bunch of cables curled up on the ground but Hyunjin has no idea where to even start.

Heejin takes a closer look at the generator and her eyes light up in familiarity. “Oh! Wait, I recognise this. My family has one in our backyard, I think I’ve seen my dad start it up a few times. Let me see if I can figure it out… Although, you’ve got to do the work because I can’t feel my fingers,” Heejin tries in vain to wiggle her fingers.

“Take me through it, then,” Hyunjin picks up a roll of cables and looks to Heejin for instructions. 

“Uh, okay. First, you need to plug in those cables to the outlet at the side of the generator. Woah, these are a lot bigger than the ones at my house. Yeah, that side. Is it in?” Heejin peers over to check on Hyunjin.

“Right. Now, try to connect these two cables here together then turn on the switch that either says ‘main’ or ‘power main’, I think? Make sure it’s actually turned on and not just blinking,” Heejin looks over to see Hyunjin stifling a laugh.

“What?” Heejin’s eyes narrow as she scrutinises Hyunjin. 

Hyunjin snorts, “Nothing. Just, do you hear yourself?”

“God! You’re so dirty. Focus! Anyways, now you should be able to see your options for re-directing the power appear on the panel. What options do we have?”

The bright blue panel flickers slightly as Hyunjin scrolls down the list. “There are three options for the main office, another six for the electronic perimeters and two for heating and landlines,” Hyunjin looks at Heejin for some sort of answer.

“Okay, so? Turn them all back on!” Heejin says with irritation.

Hyunjin rolls her eyes, “We can’t overload the grid. It’ll just cause the whole thing to die on us again. We can re-direct the power to about eight of the cells, though.”

They both sigh.

“Okay, in that case, the electronic perimeters _have_ to be up. Maybe the electricity for the main office too, all of the internet servers are in there and we can’t risk them crashing,” Heejin mentally adds the cells up in her head.

Hyunjin startles, “What about the heating? You’re freezing.”

“Right now, I’m cold but alive. If the backup servers die or one of those animals escapes under our watch, Sooyoung’ll make sure I’m both dead and cold. Now, turn the electronic perimeters on,” Heejin says with finality even as she stuffs her hands deeper into the pockets of Hyunjin’s coat and tugs the coat tighter around her.

Within a few minutes, they can hear the electronic perimeters of the sanctuary come back online with a dull buzz. Once they return to the main office, they are fortunately greeted with a fully powered-up vending machine. 

Hyunjin taps a code into the panel of the vending machine and watches as a pathetic packet of crackers tumbles down. “Lucky me, at least I’ll get to die with a stomach full of off-brand animal crackers!” She chuckles awkwardly as Heejin continues to absentmindedly knock the back of her ankles against a desk. 

Hyunjin tears open the packet and shakes it at Heejin invitingly, “Animal cracker for your thoughts?”

A hand reaches into the packet begrudgingly and tosses the animal cracker into her mouth. 

“Hyunjin, you know I’m sorry for being an ass to you, right?” Heejin’s lips move on their own accord and before she can even register it, she’s plunged herself into this uncomfortable conversation. The exact conversation she’s been trying to avoid for the past few months. 

Hyunjin’s expression is unreadable but she’s clearly confused. “Oh, are we having this conversation now?” Hyunjin’s voice edges on lightheartedness, but it’s not quite there. 

“We don’t have to if you don’t want to, really. It’s just… Aren’t you tired of _this_?” Heejin gestures vaguely at the space between them.

Heejin’s tone is mild and hesitant, “The truth is, Hyunjin- This is so much harder than it was in my head. I’ve always been _so, so_ envious of you. Ever since we were in college together, you were always Kim Hyunjin: the girl who could look at a mouse shivering and tell immediately what was wrong. I could never wrap my head around how you did that. How?” Heejin lets out a bitter laugh as she shakes her head.

“And here, too. You’re just so _effortless_ , the way all the animals like you, the way Jungeun and Vivi and Jinsol and _even_ Sooyoung loves you. It just makes me feel so little, so powerless. I really thought it’d be easier coming here but then you, _you stupidly perfect being_ , you arrived. Part of me hated the thought of being second best again, but really, I just- For once in my life, I wanted to feel like I was _good_ at something.”

Hyunjin can’t find the words as she watches the tears in Heejin’s eyes make their way down her cheek. It’s hard to see Heejin’s face clearly in the dim half-lit office and the fact that she has her head dipped makes it even harder. 

Heejin heaves and sucks in a breath, “So, what I’m really trying to say is- I’m sorry, Hyunjin. I’m sorry for being a terrible person to you when all you’ve ever done for me has been good. You didn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of all this… _shit_ I’ve put you through.”

The taller girl leans over to tug Heejin close to her, arms encircling her waist. 

“You’re not a terrible person, you’re one of the kindest people I’ve ever met. I mean, how many people have managed to tolerate a thirty-minute long crying session with Sooyoung?” Hyunjin chuckles and she feels Heejin giggle against her too.

“If it makes you feel better, I envy you too. The way you’ve been able to get those kittens to love you? I wish I could do that,” Hyunjin huffs.

Heejin looks up, “Wait, what? No! All the animals love you! I don’t think there’s a species on Earth that could resist you…”

“Not even you?”

Warmth spreads up Heejin’s cheeks, blooms into the tip of her ears as she hits Hyunjin on the shoulder. 

“That’s not what I meant!” Heejin groans at the corny joke.

Hyunjin swats her away, “Yeah, right. Well, anyway, I’m really glad we finally had this conversation. I was getting tired of pretending I liked tea. You always hog the coffee machine.”

A scandalised gasp, “No, I don’t! And says you? _You’re_ the one always hogging the toaster!”

They share a laugh for a few seconds, the atmosphere between the two of them finally winding down after what feels like an eternity. Heejin basks in the feeling of lightness in her chest, a feeling she hasn’t felt in a very long time as she watches the smile on Hyunjin’s face linger. Feeling bold, she inches closer to Hyunjin. 

“Can we hug it out?”

Hyunjin’s nose wrinkles, “What? Did we not just do that?”

“Just do it!” Heejin’s arms are extended, welcoming.

Hyunjin groans but caves in as she pulls Heejin into a comforting embrace. She feels Heejin’s chin rest on her shoulder and her arms going slack on around her own.

“Okay, now can we stay like this for a bit? We didn’t re-direct any power to the heater and now, I can barely feel my fingers. Also…” Heejin trails off. 

Hyunjin looks back at her expectantly, “Also?”

“Also, you smell nice. Now, pretend I didn’t say anything, please.”

A snort, “Sure. That’s nothing after you called me ‘ _stupidly perfect’_ , anyways.”

Heejin feels herself sink into a pit of humiliation. 

\--

The next morning, Jinsol returns to the office to fetch something for Sooyoung. She says nothing when she sees Heejin and Hyunjin tucked under a coat against one another on the floor, opting instead to quietly slip one of her old lab coats over them before leaving as soundlessly as she arrived. Needless to say, Sooyoung quickly finds out. 

But Jinsol can feel the change in the atmosphere almost immediately. Jungeun takes a while to pick up on it, Sooyoung is still completely bewildered and Vivi simply smiles knowingly. If there’s anything Sooyoung’s grateful for is that she can finally enter the pantry without having to awkwardly manoeuvre between the two younger girls.

Sooyoung manages to catch Heejin between cubicles one day, taps her lightly on the shoulder and waves her over. It’s a dress-down Friday and Sooyoung quickly notices that Heejin has on the same shirt that Hyunjin was wearing just two dress-down Fridays ago. 

“So, what changed?” Sooyoung raises an eyebrow at Heejin invitingly, her scandalised expression saying it all. 

Heejin blushes, her face flushes a light shade of pink as she shoots an equally scandalised look at Sooyoung in return. “I could ask the same about you and Dr Jung…” Heejin nudges the older woman playfully. 

“I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours! And you’re forgetting who’s the boss here, anyways!”

A sigh from the younger girl, “Fine. If you must know, we finally sorted it out like _a few weeks ago_?”

Sooyoung groans, “ _Fuck!_ Jinsol was right all along? Guess that’s goodbye to my ten bucks, then…”

“You guys were _betting_ on this? Lame.” Heejin can barely hide her disgust.

“Please. So, are the two of you _dating_ now or what? Spill the beans!”

“We’re testing the waters… I’ll update you if anything does happen, alright? It’s still early days!”

“Fine…” Sooyoung concedes as she lifts her hands in surrender.

Heejin leans forward in interest, resting her chin on her palm as she smirks at Sooyoung. “Your turn, boss,” she teases.

“Unlike you _babies_ , we actually got somewhere. We’re moving in together in a week, we’ve just got the keys to the apartment.”

“No way! What? No! How long have you both been secretly dating?” Heejin’s eyes widen and her tone is completely scandalised.

Sooyoung laughs lightly, “Jinsol and I have been on-and-off for forever, like ever since we were in high school together? It’s been a long time. Point is, somehow we made it work? I don’t know, I’m just glad!” 

Heejin detects the saccharine in Sooyoung’s voice, the warmth in her eyes as she talks about Jinsol and it makes her heart swell just in the slightest. 

That evening, Hyunjin’s the one who drives them to dinner. Heejin prefers the seats in Hyunjin’s car, anyways. From the passenger seat, Heejin admires the way Hyunjin’s hands clench around the steering wheel. She’s familiar with Hyunjin’s habits, the way her eyes shift at every turn, the way she clenches her teeth to resist the urge to honk at another driver. 

Hyunjin reaches for the radio, her fingers deftly switching it on. 

The melody rings like clockwork in Heejin’s head as the song playing on the radio fills the car. It’s the song that’s woken her every day for the past few years of her life. 

“I like this song,” Hyunjin says off-handedly as she hums along.

Heejin smiles warmly, eyes still on Hyunjin.

“Yeah, me too.”

And so, they sing along together. It’s a different part of the same song, not the same part that jolts Heejin awake each morning. Nonetheless, they both know it by heart.

  
  


_‘The time that is unraveling in front of us is real slow._

_The world that is your’s and mine seems to be frozen in place,_

_Time that has gone round and round in circles feels like a dream._

_And now in front of my eyes, it’s you who makes me feel so high,_

_All the time.’_

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Before writing this, I never knew I'd have to google "how does a backup power generator work" but here we are. The idea of Heejin and Hyunjin and animals is just so silly and warm and lovable to me. So, I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it! Hopefully, you liked the yvesoul on the side... I think they're cute.
> 
> Drop a kudos and a comment too!


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